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From the book
Working Musicians
by Bruce Pollock


It Was the Rock and Roll Dream
Cindy Bullens
Cindy Bullens
 
   
It was the end of July 1975; I was living in Los Angeles and my friend Bob Neuwirth called me up and said I'm sending you a ticket. You have to come in to New York for a week and do this thing at the Other End. Dylan's going to be there. Mick Ronson and Rambling Jack Elliot are coming down. T-Bone Burnette and Steven Soles are going to be there; David Mansfield wandered in - he's still one of my closest friends to this day. I was basically part of the backup band and we all sang songs together for a week. And out of that came the seeds for the Rolling Thunder tour.

I went back to L.A. and all of August they were pulling it together, so I assumed that's what I was going to be doing. Then in September I crashed this party and met Elton John and was literally asked that night to go on the road with him. It was a Wednesday night; rehearsals started Friday. So I had Thursday to make up my mind. I had no manager. I had a few people who were in the music business who I may have asked at the time, but to be honest with you, I had to make the decision in a day. It was Oh my god, should I go on the road with Bob Dylan as a band member and be able to do one of my own songs? Or should I go on the road as a backup singer with Elton John who was one of my idols?

Money didn't even cross my mind. I don't even know if there was any money involved in the Rolling Thunder tour. There certainly wasn't a lot of money at that time with Elton John. But there was nobody bigger than Elton in 1975, in terms of being an entertainer. Dylan was in kind of a lull in 1975 and this was part of what was bringing him back. It was two totally different ideologies. And at that point, much to the chagrin of Bob Neuwirth and some of my friends, who thought that songwriting was the most important aspect of what I did, I felt that my performing capabilities or my wanting to be a rock and roll performer, was a more compelling pull to me.

I never felt I made the wrong decision, I just have felt over the years regretful that I couldn't have done both. I ended up doing three concerts with Rolling Thunder. But I would have loved to have been involved in the whole subculture on a daily basis. I did have some moments backstage, in the hotel rooms, in the bus with Allen Ginsburg. But I wasn't involved in the daily aspect of it.

Elton John was a whole different ballgame, let me tell you. He had his own jet. We were traveling around in private jets and limousines. It was the rock and roll dream come true. I went from having done a few backup vocal sessions on record to actually being out there playing in front of thousands and thousands of people. We did Dodger Stadium, seven nights at Madison Square Garden. I had to get used to being in the limelight. I got a lot of attention, a lot of press, because I was the only girl, I was young, I had a tiny bit of history with the Bob Dylan thing; I had done backup vocals on Gene Clark's record, a couple of Bob Crewe records. Elton made sure that I got attention, which was very gracious of him. I learned a lot from Elton in terms of working with a band, working an audience - a huge amount about working an audience. We rehearsed for a week and once we got through the rehearsal part of it Elton pretty much delegated what he needed to say to other people, at least with the background vocals. His guitarist, Davey Johnstone, was more of the director of the background vocals.

Obviously that put me on the map. I was on the road in '75 and '76; in '77 I mostly wrote, and in '78 I got a record deal with United Artists and Desire Wire came out in '79. The album got incredible reviews. I was called the next big thing in rock and roll. People called me the female Bruce Springsteen. They said I had the energy of Springsteen, the look of [Mick] Jagger, and played guitar like Keith [Richards]. The single "Survivor" was going up the charts. It was number fifty six after three weeks. And then it disappeared, because the record company folded. That was devastating to me because I knew I had made a great record.

A year later my second album came out on Casablanca--and that label folded too.

In 1982, we moved back to New York from L.A. and I had my first daughter and then moved directly to rural Connecticut. So I was really isolated. In two years I went from being a rock and roll star in L.A. to being in rural Connecticut with a baby. As anyone who's had kids will tell you it's kind of tempting to just shut yourself off and I did that. I shut myself off for a number of years. I lost touch with a lot of people. I think at that point my dreams of being a rock star were starting to fade; I always did think of myself as a musician and a songwriter, but I had no idea how to get back into the business while having this child.

Then in 1984 I got pregnant again, and it was really when I was pregnant again and gave birth to my second daughter, that I came to a resolve that somehow I was going to have to find a way to do my music. So we moved closer to New York and I started writing again. I would go into the city and co-write, which I had never done. I'd take Jessie with me in a little basket. That's how I started kind of easing my way back in. I put a band together of local musicians and started playing once a month at the Red Rock Café in Westport, Connecticut.

In 1988 I got another record deal, with Al Teller at MCA. Al had originally wanted to sign me back in the 1970s. I was Al Teller's first signing when he became president of MCA. And then he immediately went to CEO, so he wasn't even involved in the record, and the record never got heard. It wasn't even panned; it was just not heard. That was a heartbreaker. That was even more of a heartbreaker than the first two records not being heard. Because I really thought I had a shot this time and nothing happened. I felt that was kind of the last straw. I've had three major record deals. I'm in my thirties and have two kids. But then I said okay, I've got to figure something out, because I have to do music.

So in 1990, at the suggestion of some friends and acquaintances like Emmylou Harris and Bonnie Raitt, I took a trip to Nashville. I got an incredibly positive reception there. People knew who I was. They thought my writing could be a breath of fresh air. It took me a couple of years to figure out what country music was. Roots music and country music are not the same thing. Country has very strict standards on lyrics, direction, even though it was breaking open at that time. But I met with some wonderful people. I wrote with Al Anderson, Matraca Berg, Mary Ann Kennedy, Kye Fleming. Radney Foster and I had a couple of hits. I could have made a really good living there, but my family didn't want to live in Nashville, so it was a compromise. I'd go down there for about a week a month, but at least I got my foot in the door again. I was doing something I loved. And I recreated myself as a Nashville songwriter.

A lot of these people helped me put together Somewhere Between Heaven and Earth when my daughter Jessie died after a long battle with cancer in 1996. She obviously provided the inspiration for the songs. But, this may sound funny, there's no question in my mind that after her death, she also kept kicking me in the butt, saying, get out there, mom; this is what you need to do. In the last year and a half I have played every type of venue you can possibly imagine. I do a lot of benefits. I played at the Experience Music project in Seattle. The other extreme was playing in an office building in Washington DC for a bunch of executives who just wanted to hear me sing. I've literally played everywhere from Maine to Alaska.

My next record won't be Somewhere Between Heaven and Earth. I can never do that again. I don't want to do that again. I won't top it. It's an entity into itself. There will be shreds of the same sentiment, but there will also be a lot of rock and roll. A year and a half ago I could no nothing except the songs from Somewhere Between Heaven and Earth. That's all I wanted to do. That's all I cared about doing. And it's all that people wanted to hear. Those songs are still the bulk of my set, but in the last six months, I've been doing some songs I've written since then that are going to be on the new CD. I also do a few of the old songs, things people might know, like "Survivor" and "High School History." As an encore I always do a rocker that people absolutely love. It's just a flat out rock and roll song. I know now that I have the capacity to go out and play solo, with just my guitar, or I can rock you out with a band. I'm performing mostly with my drummer, who plays a full set of drums, so we sound like a band. I've only played maybe three or four gigs with a full band this year, which I absolutely love to do, but it's not cost effective. I've always loved performing. Since I was six years old I loved to get up in front of an audience and sweat. The only thing is, I don't jump off any pianos anymore. I already had a knee operation that probably was the result of jumping off one too many pianos.

I have no idea what my future is. I could be dropped by this record label in two seconds. I used to want to be famous. Now I couldn't care less if I'm famous. That doesn't make my life complete. The music makes my life complete.
 
       
   
Copyright ©2002 Harper Entertainment. Reprinted with Permission.
 
       
   
amazon.com
 
       
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For more information visit:

http://www.cindybullens.com
 
       
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The following Working Musicians interviews are featured:

Cindy Bullens,
It Was the Rock and Roll Dream

Lita Ford,
One of the Guys

Cheryl James,
It Wasn't a Mutual Decision

Brenda Kahn,
Almost Famous

Laura Nyro,
Growth and Change
 
       
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Working Musicians by Bruce PollockThis interview is excerpted from the book Working Musicians (Harper-Collins), by Bruce Pollock. Bruce is the author of eight other books on music, including The Rock Song Index, Hipper Than Our Kids, When Rock Was Young, When the Music Mattered, and In Their Own Words, as well as three novels, and is the founding co-Editor in Chief of GUITAR: For The Practicing Musician. His work has appeared in The New York Times, Saturday Review, TV Guide, Entertainment Weekly, Musician, Family Weekly, USA Today, Playboy, The Gannett Westchester Newspapers, and The Village Voice.
 
       
   
 
 
 

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