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PHOTOGRAPHER:
MERRI CYR
Photo Essay and Interview
by Brenda Kahn |
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photo
by Matt Magee
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met Merri Cyr in 1992 through our mutual friend Jeff Buckley. A
year later I found myself in a full-length slip standing on gravestones
in a Brooklyn cemetery while she snapped the shutter. Cyr is one
of those rare artists who possess the ability to mix the emotional
and the visceral, creating form in her photographs that speak for
the subject, the landscape and herself. |
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WOMANROCK:
You started out on the other side of the camera doing modeling when
you were a teenager. How did that influence you towards being a
photographer?
MERRI:
Modeling was sort of a fluke to begin with in that like most insecure
teenage girls I was looking at Seventeen magazine as a reference
to what I was suppose to be. I entered something called the 'Loves
Baby Soft' modeling contest and was brought to NY for a weeks stay
as one of the finalists. It was a bizarre experience to be from
a small New England town, get transported to NY, ride around in
limos, stay at the Pierre hotel and be photographed by Richard Avedon
at the age of fifteen. I won the contest and got a modeling contract
with the Elite model agency. That was the fun part.
WOMANROCK:
How did you like the world of modeling?
MERRI:
Modeling itself was a hideous experience. The objectification and
cruelty of the people in the fashion industry was extremely damaging
to me emotionally. Dehumanizing. I was too young.
The two good things that did happen as a result of that experience
was that I found my home in New York and my introduction to photography.
WOMANROCK:
It must have been very empowering to be on the other side of the
camera.
MERRI:
I used a thing that had been destructive towards me as a way to
heal myself and plug back into the world, as a way to connect with
people instead of objectifying them, to enhance as opposed to diminish
their personalities. I wanted to reveal instead of conceal their
uniqueness. It has been a way to feel my way back into the world
and have faith in other people as well as myself.
I remember when I was modeling that I would watch the photo assistants
figuring out the lighting and sets. I would always be wishing I
could do what they were doing instead of what I was doing.
WOMANROCK:
So when did photography become your life and your career?
MERRI:
I started shooting on the street when I was in high school. Then
I went to Pratt Institute and studied photography thanks to the
influence of my wonderful high school art teacher Narciso Maisterra,
a Spanish painter. Without his help I would have never understood
my potential as an artist.
When I graduated Pratt I had all sorts of weird freelance jobs to
get by. (ie: I took video confessions for the D.A.'s office in Queens,
filed slides at Magnum photos, videotaped media training videos
for Ogilvy and Mather and worked in a carpentry shop.) Being a photographer
in New York is probably comparable to being an actor or musician.
You gotta have some tenacity.
I have been pretty much able to support myself as a photographer
for the last ten years, but you know, it's freelance. I still don't
have any health insurance.
WOMANROCK:
The online photo essay, "Wished for Song" highlights photographs
you took during Jeff Buckley's musical career. What brought you
to the decision of publishing this book entirely online?
MERRI:
Well, after I completed putting the book together I talked to a
few book agents and some publishers about putting it out but there
have been a few obstacles. Although Jeff is extremely popular in
countries such as Australia and France, here in the US he still
remains relatively obscure to the general population. There is a
written biography about he and his dad that will be coming out soon
and I think that the companies [publishers] felt there wouldn't
be enough demand for two books, even though mine is primarily photo
based.
At one point St. Martins Press promised that they would put it out,
but after four months of promising I would have a contract the next
week, the art director that said he would do it left his job. My
brother was staying with me at the time and I asked him "What if
we just put in on line?" Without thinking about the amount of work
it would take he said, "O.K." I am lucky that my brother is such
an amazing programmer and also that he was willing to transform
the book into Web form. It is an understatement to say that I wouldn't
have been able to do it without him.
WOMANROCK:
How has the response been?
MERRI:
The response to the on-line book has been phenomenal. Initially
I E-mailed about fifty people. Since then we have had over 100,000
visitors and I've received thousands of letters about it. It has
been amazing.
WOMANROCK:
Your personal photography is a departure from the portrait work
that you do. How does one influence the other?
MERRI:
The thing with me is that there is so much cross over between my
personal work and commercial work that it is very difficult sometimes
to make a clear distinction. I mean, some things are strictly for
commercial purposes. Most of my jobs have been for album packaging.
I chose this area of specialization because there is a lot of room
for experimentation and play. It has been part of my job to supply
a wide variety of imagery in every shoot I do. This is what I love
about it. Some photos are more conceptual in nature whereas others
are more direct. But no matter what I'm shooting, for a job or otherwise,
hopefully the subtext is always there.
WOMANROCK:
Many of your photographs have a dream-like or trance-like quality
to them. Are your photographs in fact inspired by dreams or is there
a particular idea that you find being expressed through your work?
MERRI:
Inevitably my photographs are a subjective expression of a particular
moment. Although I feel my presence in the photographs I take, it
is very important to me that I am receptive, and not just projecting
my own point of view onto someone else. What makes a photo interesting
to me is the expression of the energy, the alchemy of that moment,
momentarily caught in the net of a certain shutter click. It's sort
of like fishing for unknown treasure whose meaning only becomes
evident later. But that meaning can also change with the passage
of time.
As far as the idea of dreams go in influencing my work, I love the
idea that my unconscious mind is interacting in the world of "reality,"
revealing things that might be obscured to my conscious mind. But
isn't it the function of all artists, in wonderfully varying degrees,
to unveil conventional impressions of reality as the mysteries they
are?
WOMANROCK:
Who do you love to photograph?
MERRI:
My favorite subjects to shoot are whoever is in front of me at this
particular moment. I love the psychological adventure of finding
common spaces with so many diverse and interesting people. Human
beings are fascinating. The greatest privilege is being allowed
to visit a strange unknown planet and go on a journey with its inhabitants.
Sometimes the most exciting adventures are with the people you initially
might think you have the least in common with. The trick is never
to judge at the outset, leave the door open and keep saying yes.
WOMANROCK:
How does astrology play into your life and your work?
MERRI:
Once again, for me it's about energy. Everyone clings to something
in their life to give them a sense of the order of the Universe,
for me it's my dabbling in astrology. I don't like using astrology
to judge people, but instead as an indicator of what strata their
energy might be coming from. It is interesting as a study of how
you might approach someone, if they were, let's say, a fire sign.
It is interesting to compare traits of people of the same or different
signs. There is a certain consistency of energy patterns. I know
it sounds nuts, but whatever, that's my attempt at ordering something
that is almost entirely incomprehensible to humans, how the Universe
sticks together the way it does. God.
WOMANROCK:
Tell me about the transition between still photographs and film.
MERRI:
Stills are momentary impressions. Film is the expression of much
fuller ideas. To do a good film of any kind, you must have a story
to tell. Film is not just reactive, it has a specific intention
or idea to share with people.
WOMANROCK:
How did the idea for this documentary film about women musicians
come about?
MERRI:
This documentary is the culmination point of a lot of different
issues in my life. One issue is that although I love photography
I am at a stage now where I have stories I want to share in a more
complete way. I have always dabbled with film and video but didn't
feel fully able to tell a full tale. It's about getting to a place
of knowing myself much better and feeling I have something to offer.
WOMANROCK:
What made you want to work with the subject of obscure women musicians?
MERRI:
Initially my idea for the documentary was provoked by my experiences
taking photos for the larger record labels. I was disturbed that
there was such a narrow margin of acceptability for female musicians
in those systems. It is just totally laughable. Everything was based
on a female's marketability as a general product, not by the caliber
of their work. I am not saying it's not hard for men, it is. But
for women musicians the criteria is this: You must be emaciated,
sexy in a sale-able way (talent totally aside), and you have to
be very business savvy to get people in the companies to push your
product.
Also, most of the time you are asked to change the content of your
work into a form that is already an established market. This is
something very few artists are capable of doing without going crazy.
You know, this all wasn't a big surprise or anything, but it still
disturbs me. I have seen very few conventional "success" stories
within the industry even with musicians who have landed the illusive
record 'deal.' Most of the time the deal is the worst thing that
ever happens to a musician.
WOMANROCK:
So this a way of addressing the issue.
MERRI:
I felt that if people just got a glimpse of what they were missing
they would ask the question, "Why don't I ever get to see this?"
It started as a general idea of making a platform where I could
show people some great musical talent they might not ordinarily
get access to. But of course like all explorations the idea has
expanded down other pathways.
WOMANROCK:
Tell me a little bit about the performers in this film.
MERRI:
The first person I have filmed is a good friend of mine, Dawn McCarthy.
She has been a great inspiration to me on many different levels.
She fits the oddball female musician criteria and then some. She's
an amazing vocalist and yodeler, a music ethnologist, a performance
artist, a doll maker and puppeteer. No kidding. What has become
more evident to me through working with her is what it truly means
to be totally authentic in your work and mode of living. Needing
to be your art in the same way a person needs to breathe. This is
how I want to be, the same as my art, no distance between.
I have also been filming a musician named Eszter
Balint, but instead of doing four shorter pieces as originally
intended I will complete the piece on Dawn first. I think it will
be titled 'Faun Fables'.
WOMANROCK:
How do you balance your creative world and the demands of maintaining
a career as an artist?
MERRI:
My focus has changed a lot in the last year. I think initially work
is outwardly motivated by an idea of wanting to be successful and
gain approval in some way. That's something that seems really important
when you're starting out. Making it. I'm not saying I don't want
to be successful at what I do, I do. But the shift has been about
the meaning. I don't just want to provoke, I want to inspire. I
think I can do this by exploring what it is that inspires me artistically
and putting that out in a form that people might be touched by.
On a materialistic practical level, I get by. I do many more jobs
now for independent people putting out their own albums. It is not
as much money as I make with the labels but I get a lot of satisfaction
helping someone to put out a good looking album package, something
that reflects them.
I feel very lucky that I am able to do the work I love. It's all
exploration. I believe in the 'follow your bliss' philosophy. Good
old Mr. Cambell.
WOMANROCK:
Is there anything you would like to add?
MERRI:
Everyone has the capacity to create and has something to offer the
world. That's what we're here for. That's our job, to make our unique
gifts manifest.
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[
CONTINUED ] Photo Essay |
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_________________________________
You can find out more about Merri Cyr's work at:
http://www.merricyr.com |
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_________________________________
Brenda Kahn
is a New York recording artist and the editor of WOMANROCK.com.
Past notes from the Editor. |
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